Andrea Elizabeth’s Wordpress Blog

Bill Kaufman at Taki’s Mag has written a good article on Ron Paul at the end of his campaign. I’m getting less interventionist every day. We need to clean up our own house before we attempt theirs. Maybe we’ll be ready to houseclean 4 years from now? Bill says Ron’s irrepressible.

I skim the intro’s to the articles on Taki’s mag and am usually drawn to continue reading Helen Rittelmeyer’s before I even know she wrote them. Her article on Mother’s Day helps update me on how feminism is faring these days. I’ve always liked Annie Oakley and appreciated the comment by the man who liked tomboys. There’s a mysterious line between freedom to do and be who you are to the best of your ability, and crossing the line into unflattering adjectives.

I may be being a bit impulsive and may not be researching thoroughly enough, but I went ahead and ordered the Ancient History Portfolio recommended on the St. Theophan Academy blogsite, as well as her suggestion for learning Latin called Lively Latin. The same history portfolio is recommended on the Paidea Classic Homeschool Resources site. I’m new to the Classical approach to education, but do not feel that deprived because of the dialectical element. I just started to read part of Plato’s Apology, linked from the Paidea site, and got a post-traumatic stress reaction from our court room experiences and the subsequent debates I have engaged in online. I do better in question-answer/catechetical environments. But this implies that someone already knows the answers, and not that they are being derived through dialectics. I know that there is value in discussing things from differing points of view, but to me this is a way to better understand each other (question/answer), to discover weaknesses in a point of view, to gain new insights, and to explore and prioritize. I suppose these goals can be accomplished dialectically, unity and/or conversion can be achieved, but more often dialectics seems a mode to defend ones self, intimidate, subjugate, and to get notches on one’s belt. That’s been part of my motivation at least.

Still, my best times in discussions have been with people who knew more than me and expressed themselves better and when I was the recipient/questioner. I guess being female, that is what I do best. The male/female hierarchy has proven itself true to me, sometimes to my disappointment. I’m left to record my experience and explorations for general amusement, and for the guidance of my children. Such is the role of women. But does that mean I get the short end of the stick? Even though I’ve felt that way sometimes, it surely isn’t so. Children are the glory of women, and my kids, for better or worse, are my head-covering. I get to gaze on them and see the fresh face of angels. Not that they’re perfect and haven’t suffered from my failings, but I am proud of them and very thankful for them and really would rather be in no other place that with them in our homeschool environment.

As I approach the fall when one will move to a Dallas dorm, and one will be carpooling with and thus gone as long as his dad, and the other continue in his community college and work schedule, I am very glad to have them leave the nest with such excitement and anticipation, to which I owe Abeka’s more practical, challenging, left brain approach, to some extent. But I have three left at home, so I don’t know if I’ll be as positive when their turn comes. I don’t have to worry about having a completely empty nest for another 10 years. *conflicted sigh*

So, back to the Classical approach, I’m not that excited about learning western philosophy and its close kin literature, but I do want to incorporate more history about the millenniums before and after Christ and learn some Latin. I’ve talked about some of my problems with romantic and external conflict-oriented literature. I think the first unrealistic and daydreamy and the second, war/divorce inducing. I like psychological dramas better, like Silence of the Lambs which is definitely off the topic of homeschooling so I think I’ll steer towards Dostoyevsky. I saw the Gregory Peck version of his “The Gambler”, called The Great Sinner and had to switch channels during the part where he crossed the line to become a slave to his new addiction. It was too painful to watch his life-ruining fall, and how it-could-happen-to-anyone-even Gregory Peck(!) realistic it was. All to say that I like a thorough investigation of why people act the way they do, but getting into the mind of the more extreme actors-out in our society is pretty disturbing. Still, we are all affected by what they do, and understanding them is a first step towards at least our own healing from their effects, I believe, but maybe I’m wrong.

So learning corrected history and languages is a big step towards understanding other people. I used to believe literature can be too, but if the writer’s philosophy is wrong, then reading them helps you understand dysfunction better, which has it’s place in relating to them, but one must be healed by an alternative method.

The booklist to the Portfolio series looks a little daunting, but I’ll wait till I study the material more when it comes in the mail to figure out how to tailor it to our needs/abilities/schedule.

Now that my oldest three have (practically) graduated, I’m re-evaluating my homeschool curriculum. I’ve complained before about how Protestant Abeka is. They go out of their way to vilify the Catholics and almost completely ignore the Orthodox and their lands with their history. I’ve continued to use it so far because I didn’t want to switch while the boys were midway through high school, Abeka is so organized and takes the guesswork out of planning, and they provide videos for the more involved subjects. I haven’t had to think about what to teach for a while. I tried Sonlight for a couple of years, but it can be pretty burdensome and some of the literature recommended for jr high is traumatic, like Flames of Rome and Peace Child. However, I really liked their Native American studies, which I think were in their Core 3. After this year I’ll only have one boy and two girls in my younger group, so I want to find a gentler approach. Also, Sonlight used to include an optional section in high school on Eastern Orthodoxy with Father Schmemann’s For the Life of the World, but I just noticed it’s been removed.

While surfing this morning, I came across this Orthodox Homeschooling blog and looked up her History Portfolio Curriculum. I think I’ll order the Ancient History Portfolio for juniors for my soon to be 3rd grader and may stick with Abeka’s Geography for my soon to be 9th graders because the video teacher for that class was the most unbiased of all of them and seemed to love all the children of the world. Then for the next year they recommend the Medieval History Portfolio, which I believe is the most neglected and abused part of Protestant education. I’m not sure which age level it’s geared toward, so I’m not sure if I can include all the kids. Sonlight was good about teaching multiple age groups the same subject at the same time with more tailored activities for the different levels. Maybe this one can be customized like that too.

Especially if you have help.

While I was at Walmart buying the lovely tomato, jalopeno, bell pepper, mint, okra, and chive plants that you see here from left to right, top to bottom, my sons looked up the box gardening site and made me this frame and lined the bottom. You can see the contrast between the Miracle Grow Garden Dirt for Vegetables which I thought matched Mel’s Mix closely enough, and our total clay native-to-the side-and-back-yard soil. The more elevated front is sandy for some reason. I tried to mix the clay in a little, but the gloopy globs would not give in, so George picked me up some more MGGDfV at Walmart on his way home to make up the difference. I think it could still use another bag. So far this garden has cost $50, not counting the lumber and liner we already had. I hope it will yield enough delicious fresh, natural vegetables to make it worth while.

I probably overcrowded it and will have to thin it out later. I also wonder about the tomatoes having enough depth, the soil they came with which had roots sticking out of it only has a thin layer of MGGDfV under it. We couldn’t tell if the boxes had bottoms so we lined it with weed preventative liner that I had laying around. And now I just found that if you put it over grass, all you need is cardboard or newspaper between, which would have bio-degraded. Oops. This year is experimental, I’ll fix it next year if there’s a problem. I started a compost pile a number of months ago that may be ready to use by next year too.

I didn’t time how much direct sun it gets. In that location to the side of my house, it will get at least a few hours of afternoon sun. It is also right next to our limestone wall and concrete driveway which I think will reflect extra rays. At my previous pecan tree shaded house the extra Texas heat and reflection from the white sided walls provided enough radiation for my tomatoes and okra. Seeing the already budding yellow tomato flowers yesterday brought back memories.

I saw this first on Mimi’s blog, then when Deb opened it for everyone, I figured I’d join in.

Outside My Window …the swimming pool filter looks clogged with oak tree debris.

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I am thinking … of unclogging it.

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I am thankful for … less demands on my time.

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From the kitchen … I just finished making cinnamon toast with my daughter (for her, a protein shake for me).

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I am wearing … jeans and a purple polar bear t-shirt I purchased in Alaska.

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I am creating … rather “generating” a desire to start a square garden like the one in Mind in the Heart’s blog.

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I am going … to go to Walmart to shop for vegetable plants and for tomorrow night’s dinner (we’re bringing the steak even though it’s Friday) at a friend’s house. She invited all of us!

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I am reading … more like slowly plodding through the same friend’s recommendation of Princess Ben to preview it before I pass it on to my daughter, it’s intended audience.

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I am hoping … to make it to Walmart.

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I am hearing … Jeremy and Rachel’s science video, and Rebecca asking me a question about her school.

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Around the house …I have Pysanky eggs and materials calling me to start making it again for next spring’s sale.

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One of my favorite things … my husband bringing me breakfast in bed.

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A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week[end]: the aforementioned outing, and breakfast in bed the next morning.

Icons represent the great cloud of witnesses spoken of in Hebrews 12:1.

(Icon and info on the Saints of the Kiev Caves from this Ukrainian Orthodox site)

Both Sides Now

Rows and flows of angel hair,
And ice cream castles in the air,
And feather canyons everywhere,
I’ve looked at clouds that way.

But now they only block the Sun,
They rain and snow on everyone.
So many things I would have done,
But clouds got in my way.

I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now,
From up and down, and still somehow,
It’s cloud illusions I recall,
I really don’t know clouds, at all.

Moons and Junes and ferris wheels,
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real.
I’ve looked at love that way.

But now it’s just another show,
You leave ‘em laughing when you go.
And if you care, don’t let them know.
Don’t give yourself away.

I’ve looked at love from both sides now,
From give and take, and still somehow,
It’s love’s illusions I recall.
I really don’t know love, at all.

Tears and fears and feeling proud,
To say I love you right out loud.
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds,
I’ve looked at life that way.

But now old friends are acting strange.
They shake their heads; they say I’ve changed.
Well something’s lost but something’s gained,
In living every day.

I’ve looked at life from both sides now,
From win and lose and still somehow,
It’s life’s illusions I recall.
I really don’t know life, at all.

But I’m very thankful for my blessings which is hopefully also apparent.

means to me that things may not go as I’d like, suffering, or worse, numbness and denial, may prevail, hearts may remain cold, society may continue in selfish, individualistic patterns that find meaning in each other less and less, but all is not lost. They can’t kill God, they haven’t killed the Church Militant (I don’t believe), much less the Church Triumphant, and heaven is still at hand.

But that doesn’t mean this life or social trends don’t matter. I’m sure it’s of eternal significance to commune purely with nature nearer its telos such as Elder Porphyrios described of his experiences on Mt. Athos when the hummingbird’s beauty captured him in a remote, pure area. This type of habitat has become scarcer and scarcer as men have become colder, and “progress” has taken over the whole world. Archimandrite Zacharias, from Elder Sophrony’s monastery in Essex, said that it’s harder to find a place to be a hermit anymore. The state of man affects and dilutes us all in this current generation. But what has happened has been prophecied, and is redeemable in the end.

I hope that we at the tail end of society will not be crippled in eternity, and unable to attain theosis to the extent of the early fathers and desert dwellers because we may be impaired in this life. St. Chrysostom in his Paschal homily says that even those let in after no labors should be aloud to commune with the rest, though surely the ascetics who achieved great heights during this life will have some extra benefit. Elder Zacharias also said that in the last days, just going to Church will be a great feat. Perhaps we are the ones who are blessed for not seeing, not that we haven’t, and still believe. (John 24: 20-29)

I hope I haven’t misrepresented my citings. I know some people don’t see hermitish “communing with nature” as the end all of earthly existence as I do, and have other ideals in mind such as more uniform agrarianism or other aspects of traditional cultures which all seem to be falling by the wayside. I’m sure these losses are appropriately grieved over, but Father Roman Braga and others found God in communist prisons, tortured, in total isolation, with hardly a window to let in the sky. So knowing that that’s possible keeps me optimisitic.

Cloudy days hide the unobliterable sun.

Insults are clouds.

Sins are clouds.

We must pray the clouds away so that we can grow in the nourishing light and not shrink.

Some clouds stay longer than others.
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I’m a disillusioned optimist, not a cynical pessimist.

I don’t see the difference in half-full and half-empty because it’s still the same amount of water, and we are meant to have our cups overflow, our telos, and sometimes it seems to and sometimes it doesn’t. If we say we’ve reached a state of overflowing we’re either deluded or fixing to be spilled, and if we say we haven’t, we lack faith or the dispassion that comes when a permanently full cup is realized.

Clouds are made of water.

I have had some disappointments in my previously idyllic neighborhood. George and I moved here eight years ago from the central part of town because we outgrew my 30’s era, quaint wood-floored but one bathroomed home, and loved the out of town, rural environment, with its very small, quiet, one entrance neighborhood where everyone has at least an acre, and which is surrounded by ranches and hills. We got a great deal on our home as the previous owner had built it just before his wife left him. He was disillusioned with his dream-life/home, and behind on his taxes, so he pretty much sold it for cost to keep the IRS from seizing his profits.

But then they built a huge shopping center on the main highway which increased traffic on our ranch roads, as well as increasing the light pollution at night. We used to see a lot of stars. And more recently, one of the ranches adjoining our neighborhood sold its 45 acres to be developed for housing. My heart ached as I heard the bulldozers, in orcish fashion, cracking down groaning, longstanding oak trees behind our property. At least each custom designed house will be spread out on acre lots, and the front entrance has a nice, but faux, wooden ranch fence.

I mentioned last week that we were starting to take walks out on the ranch road. It was pretty nerve-wracking to be forced to walk in the culvert to avoid the traffic which I hadn’t realized had increased so much on a nearby road. There is a lot of natural gas drilling going on in our surrounding counties and the amount of loud trucks that it takes to haul the drilling materials is ridiculous. They’re going to have to repave all our roads, which will need to be widened when they’re through because of the new super bright shopping centers and car dealerships.

But maybe it wouldn’t be too compromising to find an unexpected boon. Yesterday we decided to walk the other direction and ended up walking through the newly paved road loop of the new, but still houseless, neighborhood. By the way, there are some aggressive dogs in our neighborhood, and the teenagers who ran over our sweet dog (Punkin, not Pippin) live there so I haven’t enjoyed walking our neighborhood for a while. We don’t stay on the heavily trucked road for very long if we cut into the new neighborhood, and the cleared land still has some trees on it and the view of the nice, rolling property is much better from the inside. And it makes the mile walk much safer. Hopefully we will get some nice neighbors who have good taste in building who will keep the walk enjoyable. I wish ranch roads were more pedestrian friendly because I’d rather walk amid the cows, goats, horses and donkeys along that route, if it were as peaceful as these pictures show.